"Why haven't you been posting for so long"

Thanks for your correspondence Shane, along with the photos of that burning AN in South Australia and that shot of you at Bordertown that looked like you had some sort of furry animal up you back tubing.

Yes I have heard it a million times before.

My first thought is to tell you to mind your own bloody business, find a railway bridge, and punish Mr Helmut.

Truth is I really haven't been ratarsed to sit down and type something for the blog. That is until today when I saw 27000+ page hits.

shit dudes, dont you railfans have a life like me?

when i am not lineside i lead a very full life of japanese panty sniffing, collecting european porn and dreaming of my younger days when i could always pull a shag at the Fortitude Valley Hotel. Sometimes even with something on two legs.

now you are all cruising the internet looking for the latest arousing shot of an AN burning up.

actually that was quite enjoyable to see, never really liked those things, look a bit like a dog thats had its arse smashed on a 45 degree angle with a meat cleaver.

Sorry didn't mean to say arse, i know how that word manages to arouse excessive carnal typed desires in those of us who like to paw over Bulldog shots, the locomotives, not that football team that is always in the news, or the animal type that, if ahhmmmm carnalised, would attract much unwanted attention from the RSPCA and other human hating people.

So it is not true I have been arrested for indecent exposure on an Exploder, the wind blew the toilet door open just as that woman walked by.

I was aquited and have just been to busy.

Well actually I have been trapped for some time, but not by law authorities, but by a woman.

Ohhh sorry, shit, hope I didn't offend any dribblers with the W word.

However the new girlfriend makes it very hard to get out and post sometimes, so please bare with me.

Anyway thats all from me, she is calling me again. I may not be able to walk again for another week.

PP

PS: Shane was that a furry creature up the clacker?

NSW POLICE FORCE

If your a resident in New South Wales and have always been comfortable that the police will help you in a time of crime

THEN IT MAY BE TIME TO THINK AGAIN

12 days after a major assault on two female friends, one 17 and the other pregnant, we are still awaiting some sort of action from the police who just pass us around between two Smogney police stations.

The full pathetic story of this ridiculous excuse of a police service will be available here shortly.

REMEMBER: Stay inside until they privitize the police force and bring on some competition.

Until then - NSW CITIZENS ARE ON THEIR OWN IT SEEMS.

ITS TIME TO BRING IN A CHANGE OF LAW MORE IN LINE WITH THAT IN ASIA.

THEN WE CAN GO AND KICK THE SHIT OUT OF THE OFFENDER AND LEAVE THE COPS WITH MORE TIME TO CHEW ON FREAKIN HOTDOGS AND FRIGGIN DONUTS.

URGENT MESSAGE TO THE AUSTRALIAN PUBLIC

The Federal Government is sending many of us a $1000 to $1,400 bonus.

If we spend that money at K-Mart, the money will go to China.

If we spend it on petrol it will go to the Arabs.

If we purchase a computer it will go to Taiwan.

If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.

If we purchase a good car it will go to Japan or Germany.

If we purchase useless crap it will go to Korea and none of it will help the Australian economy.

The only way to keep that money here at home is to spend it on prostitutes, wine and beer, since these are the only products still produced in Australia.

Thank you for your help.


Kevin Rudd & Wayne Swan .
( Prime Minister & Australian Treasurer)

FILTHY FIRE MONGRELS

LOOK AT HEALSVILLE LINE DAMAGE HERE!

I think it is time to investigating testie removal as punishment for this type of crime.

TO THE MURDERING BASTARDS WHO STARTED

MANY OF THE RECENT FIRES

I HOPE YOUR PENIS FALLS OFF!

FOR THE REST OF AUSTRALIA

DONATE!

Lets help those lucky enough to have survived this

disaster alive!

Donate the money set aside for your next Austrains C class, Railway Digest or gay wank mag.

* STATE TRANSIT - ADVENTURE BUSES *

Now everyone knows the 'FedUpFoamer' just loves every exciting trip he gets to take on State Transit bus services around Sydney.
Every run is a completely new adventure, from the moment you turn up at the bus stop wondering which of the timetabled services will actually show, you know you are in for something different.
The action packed thrills don't end with boarding the bus mind you - lordy no, you must always be ready to expect the upexpected. The grumpy or happy bus driver, the drug addict, the old incontinent granny who bitches the bus won't stop at her door like in the OLD DAYS, the loud speaking foreigner, the young human vermin yelling obscenities from the rear, the bus driver who feels he is on Mount Panorama or even the driver who seems to have no understanding that people are actually wanting to get to their destination in a reasonable amount of time.


If that hasn't been enough to arouse wood in even the most Viagra dependant man, then what about the graffiti, hours can be spent trying to work out what it means, the food scraps, the smelly odour from that street urchin sitting next to you.
Seems society scum has now found that scratching boring crap into bus windows ensures their lack of intelligence is there for the world to see far longer than good ol fashioned paint and pens allowed.
I mean, who really gives a toss if Steve is available at the back of the route 442 bus on Friday nights for favours of a sexual kind. However finding out that Catherine from Clovelly has herpies may serve as a community service to young men on the prowl, although giving her phone number was probably excessive.

* 343 The Excitement Bus *
We Give It A Run!

I recently heard reports from a little sparrow (think it was the same night I consumed a whole bottle of Bundy Rum) that State Transit wished to improve their image and in line with Virgin Airlines and add a bit of fun and excitement to their services.
What better way to test out all the fun of a State Transit trip than to head to the city in peak hour and await a full service on Castlereagh Street. Surely the more people, the bigger the party atmosphere.

On boarding the bus I was surprised to see no patrons with vomit stains on their old faded t-shirts, no screaming teenagers, only one crying baby and even one seat left for my usage. The customary gentleman picking his nose and rubbing it on the wall also appeared to be gone.
However companies need to look to their past as well, the buses obviously doing this and maintaining their 'every bus is late' schedule.

It was many years ago that some knob head coined the phrase "A picture says a thousand words", so in an effort to save myself time rabbiting on endlessly about the trip, I thought I would let the following in bus photography allow you to share in the excitement, the thrills, the spills and the bowel tearing laughs to be had on a standard 'Sydney Buses' service nowdays.

Now I should WARN the elderly that this may be a little to exciting, so it is always best to have spare Tena Lady Pads within easy reach, along with your Bovril and scones.
Please note also that Bovril is hot and can scold, it has also been known to fly out ones nostrils during a sudden fit of laughter.

Oh yes, it is excitement a plenty as the bus rockets of at a blinding 15kph down Castlereagh Street picking up more excited punters along the way.

Sending the bus drivers to comedy courses is certainly having an effect, with everyone in stitches the who way home.
A suggestion has been made to State Transit to replace the current seats with ones, perhaps, a little more absorbent. This is mostly for the comfort of passengers sitting soon after the leaving of the earlier mentioned elderly passengers.

Never has Elizabeth Street been more enthralling.

The kids thought it was christmas and begged to go for another ride as soon as possible.

THE VERDICT?

God - why the heck didn't I take my car?
It cost around $35 in tickets, while I could have got $25 parking in Chinatown.
Yes it's a little more stressful doing the driving yourself, but Chinatown still comes with the added urine smell one finds on the bus and for $10 cheaper (in this example).

Saving The Airline Industry - Bailout strategy

HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES?

Seems so simple.


Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.
Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What
the hell, they don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?
The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party
atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this
country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.
Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus
saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge
the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips,
including lap dances and 'special services.'
Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked
women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry
would see record revenues.
This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right -- a golden
opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.
Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself?
Sincerely,
Bill Clinton

ALCOPOPS - Suck My Balls!

SOMEONE VOTED FOR RUDDY!
YOU BASTARDS!

Thanks Rudd, please allow me to shout you one and ram it up ya clacker!
Only then will it be worth this OBSCENE price!

Campbelltown Catholic
Club Bundy and Cola
$8.50

Now lets watch the youth go out and buy Bundy straight and get even more plastered than before your most recent idiotic idea.

AND NO - I AIN'T A BLOODY LIBERAL SUPPORTER!